What a Christmas

Right now I feel like there is so much turbulence and hostility and violence and anger in my life... in my heart... and in my mind. It is really disheartening and terribly disturbing.

It feels really foreign and not feeling peace can be really ugly.

I wonder if, the more I let PEACE rule and reign in my heart, in my body, in my mind and in my spirit... I will react differently.

The more I let peace rule me the less I will react and the less I will fight and the less I will anger when I'm feeling hurt.

Feeling anger is an ugly ugly thing. But like my dear friend Thich says... acknowledge your anger. Let it know that you know it is there... that you see it... that you feel it. And let it know that you are going to take good care of it and nurture it. I wonder what made that man angry and even more how he thought to be so gentle to his anger. Gentleness is definitely not on my mind when I'm mad.

Maybe that is the problem. Maybe it should be.

Peace meditation, here I come.

In the words of my sister,

"Merry fucking Christmas"

Ten-i-see

Lets back track... yet again...

Steph and I took an emergency trip down to Knoxville TN to visit Lisa during a time in need. We decided to go on Thursday night and Friday morning we rented a car and hit the road. We had a lovely 6 hour drive together... to talk, to sing, to cry, to laugh, to enjoy being in each others presence.

We took Buddah with us... rubbed his belly... prayed to Jesus for a safe trip and for a place to stay and we were off with only the plan to go take care of Lisa. It was a good time to meditate on mysterious things like life and death and suffering and grieving. Still none of which I understand fully. Maybe we are not supossed to fully understand things like that. Things that are not of this world. Spiritual and super natural things. Maybe that is how God keeps us close, by not revealing to us everything we want to know. Maybe not. Just a lot of things were thought about. Thinking about friendship, love, community, and solidarity. When one of us suffer... we all should suffer if we are truly connected in a deep with with each other. The presence of friends in tough times is irreplaceable. Even if all you do is sit and stare at the floor. It does more help than we know.

We made it to Lisa. We got to sit with her and hold her and hug her and cry with her and remember with her and it was a holy and beautiful thing.

Time was ticking and we still didn't know where we were sleeping. I had emailed a few churches in the area the night before and asked for some family hospitality and as expected, got no responses. It's pretty shitty that you can't even count on parts of the body of Christ to put you up for a few nights when in need but you can definately count on couchsurfing.com. We ended up couch surfing with a wonderful girl and her two roommates. We hit the town of Knoxville and got a bite to eat and some drinks at a lovely place called Urban Bar. We met some interesting friends, and hung out with our cool server Travis. We continued to walk around and even found a cereal bar!

We had a good night sleeping with our new stranger friends and really enjoyed the rest of our time in TN. I captured one shot of buddah and Yuengling... i'll leave you with that...

"live your life"

Lets back track...

Two weekends ago I took a road trip out to Minneapolis with Heather T.G., Brian G., Kelly, and Emily. The girls and I were invited to go out there with the T.G.'s beacuase Heather had to speak in the MLA conference so they hooked her up in the Marriott downtown Minneapolis.
We headed out Thursday night after work and drove 12 hours through the night and arrived promptly at 6 am or something crazy. Luckily the hotel let us check in a bit early because we were about to sleep in the lobby. Heather went to work and we all crashed for a few hours. When we woke up we went in search of some lunch which led us to walk out to the ghetto and eat at a mexican place which was good at the time, and regretted later. I am not sure what we did the rest of the day except for some exploring and some sleeping and some laughing.
Kelly and I headed out about midnight for some midnight ice cream and after searching a few blocks in each direction we were only able to find some creepy men at a bar which we left and O' Dons.

O' Dons was the start of the rest of the adventures of the trip. Odons is an Irish Pub, they had a live scottish band playing and we met a lovely couple named Will and Erica who shared their table with us, made us eat some of their fries, bought us some irish cider beer, and most importantly... taught us how to do an irish dance. They made us feel like celebrities and even had the band announcing we were visiting from Ohio. We danced the night away and even taught them some Ohio dancing. Which really looks like nothing else than freedom on a dance floor. We made some fellow bike friends and included them in on our dance circle. At the end of it... I was so pleased decided to go out for some late night ice cream.

On Saturday we decided to hunt for some mom and pop pizza and we ended up finding the best pizza in the mid west. The place was run by two amazing mob looking men and was just down right yummy. The day continued from there. We ran into a protest of at least 1000 people protesting for equal rights so we put on our loud voices and our femi fists and joined them. We marched all over downtown... chanting and clapping and it was a holy and powerful thing.
We met some people who recommended seeing a band later that night at a place called the Uptown Bar. We had it on our list to hit up the C C Club so decided to do both. CC Club was an old little hole in the wall and the home of some serious socialist shit back in the 60's. We headed to the Uptown Bar after and were amazed at the bands that played. Lucy Michelle and the Velvet Lapells were the highlight for us. Check them out.

We had a few drinks and danced back to the hotel for our final night in Minneapolis. Our cab driver was a lovely man from Africa and he was here working for his two children and I accidently gave him all the money I had on me and told him to take care of his children. Then we got out of the cab and I got laughed at for it. He needed it more than I did though... I'm sure of it.


The 12 hour car ride back was really nothing to write about... so at that... i'm off.

Meditations from Thich...

"In a time of anger or despair, even if we feel overwhelmed, our love is still there. Our capacity to communicate, to forgive, to be compassionate is still there. You have to believe this. We are more than our anger, we are more than our suffering. We must recognize that we do have within us the capacity to love, to understand, to be compassionate, always."

Foot-y pajamas and the greatest friends in the world...

The three day a week work schedule is exhausting but very sutiable for a spontaneous life style.

Thursday night after work... and after our community time... we rode our bikes up to a hotel downtown for our own version of a hotel party. Greg's job had a conference there and although he lives here... they gave him a room anyway. Luckily my friends love to share so we all got to enjoy a fancy hotel overlooking beautiful Columbus with three vacant full size beds and a fridge of beer (provided by us).

We took a mini vacation on Thursday, and like any good vacation in a hotel, we went exploring. Not only did we go exploring... but we went in our socks... just like we all did as kids. We hit every floor and even found some secret passage ways, other peoples half eaten room service, and the ice machine (a personal favorite).

We got to jump on the beds, have a dance party, fight each other with pillows, and rock out with Greg's co worker and his guitar, all lay in one bed to talk laugh and snuggle, and eat free cookies. It was the best vacation i'd ever been on.

Kelly and I closed up shop the next morning and rode back in the rain. She treated me to some breakfast at Tim's and we sat inside talking of sisterhood (real and adopted sisters) and the freedom and acceptance of that kind of relationship. We talked of the value of our friendships with our moms... which can be deeper than any other human relationship... it left me feeling like we have so little time to enjoy the family we have.

Only your sisters can see you drunk, dancing in your underwear and a t shirt in a foreign country to the sound of your own awful voice to an equally awful song and not change the way they look or feel about you. THAT is sisterhood.

Friday was pretty productive... and we had a special treat for dinner with Kelly's family and pizza! I love spending time with other families especially when they remind me of my own. We then met up with the boys and headed to the monster house for Blake's show, met some new friends, saw some old and wonderful friends (kyle and paul!)

Now it is saturday night and i am laying on the couch watching center stage alone in my foot-y one piece pajamas that kelly and i picked up today. I am starting to wonder if i am becoming an old lady because I don't feel like doing anything on Saturday nights... but I am in footy pj's so probably not.

We are the insurgents...

"We are building up a new world
Do not sit idly by
Do not remain neutral
Do not rely on this broadcast alone
We are only as strong as our signal
There is a war going on for your mind
If you are thinking you are winning
Resistance is victory
Defeat is impossible
Your weapons are already in hand
Reach within you and find the means by which to gain your freedom
Fight with tools
Your fate and that of everyone you know depends on it"

Goblins, gremlins, and cows on bikes...

Halloween was... in one word... fun!

I picked Jy up from work and we went searching for a costume for him... and of course had success at VOA.

We went back to the boys place to find Greg getting into costume as an old man... and that he was. We cooked up some lovely spinach, tomato, and feta pasta, passed out candy to all the little Franklinton trick or treaters, and watched the Halloween episode of The Simpsons.

Jy went off to party and Greg and I headed to Clintonville to make some pumpkin cookies and get 80's Emily ready for fun. (Pictures coming soon...)
So 80's Emily, Old man Greg, and Ashley Cow jumped on our bikes and headed for the short north. We got lots of MOO's on the way and saw all the awesome costumes in the short north. We hit up a bar and then went to Greg's co workers house to hang out.

Shortly after emily and I decided to hit up another friends party... and what a party it was. I am not sure there has ever been a greater or longer dance party than last nights. Dancing with Pologamist wife Melissa, grandma Brad, ghetto bumble bee JPo, and all the other random people was pretty incredible. The "dance table" and the back porch ledges/benches served as great stages for our moves.

Pictures are to come... I can't stop laughing.

Emily and I had a chilly and unsable bike ride home from 12th... baked some more pumpkin cookies... made some necessary 2am phone calls to our lovely roommate in Chicago... and maybe a lot of other people. Emily and I went to bed in my bed as we are still uneasy about sleeping alone... and luckily Carl came over and fell asleep in our bathroom. haha.

o what a night...

in other news, Aubi is coming today to visit Steph and I!!!!!!